LAOS - Never as Simple as it Seems

PROLOGUE – Bridge over troubled waters

Saturday 19th September 2009 - 7.00am
Should I wake them or let them keep sleeping? Tough choice given the last 10 hours on the bus from hell.
“Girls, girls? We have to make a decision. Either we leave now or we will miss our flight.”
“Huh, what?” Andrea replied as she removed herself from sleep.
“Well I just got back from a walk to the bridge and it’s collapsed. 2 metres off the end has fallen due to a landslide. They are saying we can walk across and get a taxi to Vientiane or wait here with the bus?”
“No Today, No today!” muttered a Vietnamese man in broken English as he unloaded his luggage from the bus.

Our decision was made and off we trudged past cars, trucks and buses which lined the road for as far as we could see. We made it to the bridge and cautiously stepped across the wooden planks which had been laid down.
“Taxi lady, Taxi man?” came the call.
“Yes, we need to be at Vientiane airport ASAP, our flight leaves at 10am! Quick, quick!”
“Yes, yes plenty of time.” He said.
I got the feeling we still had no hope of making it.

On the journey we saw an overturned truck, our driver had to bribe a policeman to pass a roadblock, and we each payed an extortionate amount of money for what turned out to be a relatively short journey.
We arrived to the airport and checked in just in time and as I sat on the plane, about to take off, I wondered to myself how the hell a week in sleepy Laos could be so eventful!

PART ONE – Tubes
8 days earlier Olivia, Andrea and I had made a mad dash from school, at 3pm in the pouring rain, to make our 4.20pm flight to Kuala Lumpur and then onto Vientiane.
The clean, tree lined streets were deserted at 7am on a Saturday morning a we set out to find a guesthouse, passing rustic French colonial architecture all along the way.
After settling into our guesthouse we set out to explore the city.
Having no real landmarks or sites of interest this was a fairly fruitless adventure. We did however encounter the most orderly market you are likely to find anywhere in Asia, as well as eating some fantastic food. Vientiane is supposedly the best value for money culinary city in the world, and after a day of eating I can’t say I disagree.
Our day ended in the local bowling alley, as this was the only vaguely entertaining thing left to do in this oh so dull city.

The next day we set off on a bus to Vang Vieng, some 3 and a bit hours away and home to the legendary TUBING, a SE Asian backpacker rite of passage.
Sleeping most of the way I didn’t get to see much from the window of our rickety old bus. Upon arrival into this backpacker haven I expected to be mugged with offers of accommodation from all angles. But as I stepped from the bus not a single hawker trying to enlighten us with reasons as to why their guesthouse was better than the next. As we walked along the main road of this 2 street town I was shocked at how such a backpacker laden town, with such a reputation could still be so laidback and not overrun with opportunistic money grabbers. Most bars were fairly empty around lunch but all had TV’s with either Friends or Family Guy blazing from them. We sat in one of these bars to have some lunch and about 7 or 8 episodes of Friends and an afternoon nap, the first of the days tubing participants began to return around 6pm. They staggered up a dirt road covered in mud, bruised and battered but surprisingly sober. As time wore one, so did the drunkenness of the people. At around 8pm in the pitch black of night one particular red headed, pale skinned individual came staggering up the road, taking 2 steps forward and 4 steps back. An interesting preview to what lie ahead.

“If you bring it back before 6pm you get your deposit back,” explained the tube hire guy as he loaded us into a tuk tuk and sent us upriver.
Conversations of the previous days tubing escapades filled our ride, from new friends who were at it for a 2nd or 3rd day in a row.
“Welcome dudes, free shots on your way in!” shouted Trent, a moustached Canadian whose claim to fame was that it was his 267th consecutive day tubing.
As we settled down on the deck of the bar overlooking the river I heard “WHOOOOOOOOHOOOOOO!” and as my neck shot upward I saw a local guy launch himself from the highest branch of a tree on a trapeze swing. As he reached the apex of his swing, he back flipped off and opened and umbrella, aiming to gently float back to the inviting water of the river below. The crowd went wild as my eyes begun to focus along the river, lined with makeshift platform bars with rope swings, flying foxes, greasy poles or giant slides. This is going the awesome!

3 rope swings, 1 flying fox and 2 buckets of Lao Lao whisky, M150 (a red bull like drink banned in most western countrys) and Pepsi later and we had reached the Mud Bar. Its main feature was a mud volleyball court which instantly attracted the new crowd which arrived at the bar around the same time as us. The battle to stay on your feet was almost as much as fun as the desire to rugby tackle people you didn’t know into the muddy quagmire. After losing 2 balls into the river, the focus of the fun turned to throwing handfuls of mud at each other. It was in this moment that diaster struck. Olly had worn a mudpie in the face and was struggling to open her left eye. Initial attempts to flush her eye with bottled water were unsuccessful. Then came the hose, and finally a toothpick wrapped in cotton wool. Each attempt made by a different drunk individual. Surely not wise.

After about half an hour still no luck and Olly’s eye had swollen up and was closed tight. She urged us that she would be fine and that we should continue before it got dark. We floated further down the river stopping at the Big Slide Bar.
This would prove to be an impassable barrier, not only today but the next day as well, for one Miss Olivia Newnham. It was here that under the orders of a Dutch medicine student, who was to become known as the Love-Doctor, that she be taken back to town to get it looked at. In stepped Mama Lao, a overweight local woman dressed in a mud stained, Mekong brown nightdress. She bundled Olly on to the back of her moto and drove her back to town.

Andrea, the Love Doctor and I hit the river under the cover of darkness and headed down river, with no idea how much further we had to travel. After half an hour or so of floating in the pitch black of night we were stopped by local children who dragged us from the river and pointed us in the direction of town. Still at 10 minute walk through reeds and rivulets. If not for these kids, then we could still be floating today making our way towards the Mekong Delta.
We found Olly sat having dinner watching Friends her eye looking like she had gone 12 rounds with Mike Tyson. She said she had some eye drops and would be fine, and that she was keen to go upriver again the next day and try again.

The second attempt started in much the same was as the previous day, however somewhere between bar 2 and 3 i got separated from the girls for around an hour, and they were in possession of the money. This was a problem as I had sobered up by the time they arrived, another bucket under their belts. After watching them dance drunkenly for a while we headed for the Big Slide Bar. I was here that Olly again came unstuck.
“We are heading to the toilet” said Andrea as they stumbled off arm in arm to the rickety shack housing the toilet up on the hill.
After around half an hour, they still hadn’t returned and with darkness quickly approaching I headed up to see if they were alright. I found Andrea sitting in the mud, Olly draper across her looking rather worse for wear. Sparing too many details I ended up with Olly’s stomach bile all over my foot, in what she claims is only the second time she has ever thrown up due to alcohol.
She was determined to get back on the river and finish the job. I suggested getting a tuk tuk back to town, but she was determined not to let the river conquer her for another day.
I volunteered to share my tube with her and upon hitting the cold mountain water she decided that the tuk tuk was the wise choice.
After a dodgy dinner and 2 days of consuming Lao Lao whisky I too ended up bowing to the porcelain gods. A 3rd day of tubing was simply not an option and we decided to head to onwards to Luang Prabang.

PART TWO – Sleeping with a Ginger
180 degree left turn, 180 degree right turn, 180 degree left turn, 180 degree right turn. This is the pattern that our minivan followed up and down mountains for almost 7 hours. The van was packed to the hilt and like so many other vehicles in this part of the world, built for a smaller stature of human being. It was a mish-mash of identities, a typical Aussie accountant backpacker from Melbourne, who took advantage of the close proximity to make a move on both Andrea and Olly with the old “I’m pretending to yawn” arm around trick; 2 young Brits who swigged from a bottle of whisky the whole time; an old seedy looking guy who didn’t need to work anymore because he’d made his fortune; and Glenn, another ginger who would soon prove to become the bane of my existence, and his 2 travelling partners. The only 2 people on the van who were of sound mind were Adam and Sarah, a cool couple from the UK who were dive instructors in Borneo.
The scenery on the drive was amazing. Mountainous, lush and every different shade of green you could imagine. We passed roadside villages, filled with sparrows and rabbits for sale and smiling faces staring curiously through the glass at a wheeled tin can of white people.

When we arrived to Luang Prabang at around 8pm, we headed to find a guesthouse. For some reason Glenn, the ginger, had ditched his two female travelling partners and had tagged along with us. After checking one guesthouse which only had dorm rooms at extortionate prices, we settled on a more local guesthouse which had 3 rooms. Andrea and Olly paired off, Adam and Sarah in another room and Glenn decided he was to be sharing a room with me. Bit weird, but money saving I thought. As we walked up the stair and opened the door to our rooms it became quickly apparent that there weren’t two single beds in each room, but just one double. I was to be sharing a bed with a male that I had only met hours earlier, and he was a ginger.

With no other options I was resigned to a fate that I was not overly comfortable with.
We ventured out to the night market and had some food and few beers before heading back to the guesthouse around midnight. I cautiously entered the room, hoping to find Glenn has packed his things and left. No such luck. The only saving grace was that he had not yet arrived home. I slept fully clothed in the stifling humidity to prevent attack in my sleep from a ginger predator. Glenn arrived back at around 1.30am and I pretended to be asleep, laying as close as possible to the edge of the bed.
No attack during the night, but also no sleep as he snored his heart out and even managed to kick me a number of times. I left the room at around 6.30am and sat on the balcony and watched the sun rise. I was joined by Adam at around 7.30 and we watched 10 men try to uproot a tree. Thrilling stuff!
The next night I opted to pay double the price to upgrade to a deluxe room with ensuite to guarantee I had some sleep and didn’t have to live in fear of the daywalker.

Luang Prabang is an amazingly beautiful town set on the banks of the Mekong in the foothills of the mountains. The whole area is UNESCO World Heritage listed and tourism is just beginning to take off. We spent the next 2 days exploring waterfalls, caves, whisky villages, bear sanctuaries and riding a very temperamental elephant.
Being a communist country, Laos has a government imposed 12 midnight curfew. All businesses must be shut and locals should be in their homes.
After the bar which we were drinking at shut, we were told in whispers of the local bowling alley, which seemed to disregard to curfew and was the only place in town where you could get a drink. Being the last night of our trip we decided to kick on. We somehow squeezed 18 people from the bar into a tuk tuk. When I say 18 in, I really mean 15 inside and Adam, Myself and another guy on the roof of the converted flatbed truck, trying desperately to hang on, whilst dodging oncoming tree branches which were appearing rapidly out of the darkness in front of us.
“DISCOTEQUE, DISCOTEQUE” screamed the drunk princess in the front of the tuk tuk, and before we knew it we were at a seedy discoteque on the outskirts of town, filled with ladyboys.
“This wasn’t where we wanted to go?” murmured everyone apart from little miss oh so cool.
After paying the driver an inflated rate for the first trip, he agreed to take us back to the bowling alley. Our second game of 10 pin in the space of week; entertainment provided by the local ladies of the night, who whilst wearing next to nothing, giggled their way through their games.
Being short-changed twice by a cheeky tuk tuk driver on the way home topped off a brilliant night and we went to bed with Sarah’s voice ringing in our ears.
“I cant believe the fucker did it twice! Bastard!”

PART 3 – Machine Guns at Midnight
We left Luang Prabang on a night bus aiming to arrive in Vientiane with enough time for breakfast at the Scandinavian bakery before making our way to the airport.
Olly thought she had left her phone at the guesthouse so rushed back, only to find it was in her bag the entire time, in the process somehow misplacing her iPod. Not a great start. The VIP bus was not living up to its billing when the aisle was filled with plastic stools and locals were ushered on to sit on them.
The seats were so close together that I was unable to get my legs down and under the seat in front. They were also made of a ridiculously hard and uncomfortable plastic, covered only with a thin layer of very itchy fabric.
Our journey was to be back down the same ridiculously windy road from whence we had come in the darkness of a wet season Laos night. Before leaving a adolescent man with a huge bulge under his jacket had jumped on the bus and was standing at the very front, peering out the windscreen, scanning the roadside jungle.

Under his denim jacket he had an AK47 machine gun, ready to protect us from any would be highway bandits. Brilliant. I am guaranteed to sleep now!

At one point on the arduous journey amid the numerous sighs coming from all around the bus stopped and or protector stepped off playing his hands above his head. Surely not a good sign. Obviously we were given permission to pass, as he jumped back on and we were on our way again.

It is at this point that i should mention the continuous Laotian pop music which was blaring from the speakers all night, mainly to keep the driver awake, but i assume also to drive us westerners insane.

At around 3am we came to a stop, for what i thought might be a chance for the driver to stretch his legs.

As an hour passed and then another the rumours started to circulate the bus.

"The engine has overheated, we are waiting on parts from Vientaine."

"The city has a curfew, we wont be allowed in till 7am."

"There is a problem with the bridge."

Who knew what to believe?

As the hours passed and our flight time crept up the chances of us making it back to Cambodia for school on Monday were diminishing. The sun came up and i went for walk and discovered that infact the bridge had collapsed and around 2 metres was missing from the end. Shit!

I quickly jogged back to the bus where the girls were asleep.

Should I wake them or let them keep sleeping? Tough choice given the last 10 hours on the bus from hell.

“Girls, girls? We have to make a decision. Either we leave now or we will miss our flight.”

EPILOGUE

Laos is a ruggedly beautiful and charmingly innocent place, with friendly people and a relaxed way of life. It is about as untouched by western consumerism as you will get in this part of the world these days and this is what makes it such a special place. It's not for everybody, as we found out, but if you crave waterfalls as tall as buildings, rivers that twist and bend their way through mountains which jut up from the rice fields, caves filled with Buddha statues or Elephant rides through dense jungles then this is the place for you. If you want to swing from high wires, drink copious amounts of alcohol or laze around all day watching Friends with a cocktail in hand then your needs are also catered for.

Its a sleepy country which is just starting to realise its potential as a major SE Asian tourist destination. Get there quickly before everyone else does. And be prepared for a few surprises along the way. Because in Laos nothing is ever a simple as it seems.

The Rains are Here...

The Rains Are Here
Forest Gump once said:
"One day it started raining, and it didn't quit for four months. We been through every kind of rain there is. Little bitty stingin' rain... and big ol' fat rain. Rain that flew in sideways. And sometimes rain even seemed to come straight up from underneath."

After a mainly hassle free introduction to Phnom Penh; I kept asking myself,
"Its the wet season? where is the rain?"
Well over the last couple of weeks it has well and truly ARRIVED!
Everyone has said that during wet season you can set your watch by the rain. Normally at 3pm on the dot the heavens open for about an hour and then it stops.
The first few weeks it hardly rained at all, it kept threatening too around the magic 3pm timeslot, but it never really eventuated. I was beginning to think it was all a big scam. As i sit in my classroom and write this post the rain is coming down as if someone burst a water main in the sky.
For the last few weeks the rain has been my constant companion, so much so that some days when i am at school i hardly even notice the thumping on the windows. The locals say that because of the lack of rain at the start of the season that now it can come at any time of the day. We have had lunchtime rain and nightime rain. The rain which should come between 3-4pm has been lasting all night, or maybe for 5 minutes when you choose to go out, or maybe it will come in afternoon when you want to leave school. The worst type of rain however is.....morning rain...rain when its time to go to work.
Last week i awoke to hear the rain bucketing down and thought to myself, its ok it only sounds like one of the short rain bursts. I couldnt have been more wrong. The minutes ticked down towards 7.15am and leaving time to ride to school. I had a phone call from the girls, who had already braved the ride, asking if i could bring them some dry clothes. After collecting the mercy package of dry clothes, I had to bite the bullet and i put on what i thought was a waterproof jacket and head to school.
Before i have even unlocked the front gate and got my bike out i was soaked through head to toe. So much for the waterproof jacket. I carefully negotiated my way through the lakes that had formed on our dead end street, firmly in the belief that if it kept raining, that our 3rd floor balcony would be the only place above sea level come the end of the day.
Finally making to Mao Tse Tung Blvd i was greeted by less traffic than i am used to which was some consolation. As i approached the lights at the intersection of Norodom i was greeted by mayhem. The rain had forced a power cut, and the traffic lights (although merely an aesthetic addition to Phnom Penh's roadways at the best of times) were out and disorder was prevailing. I zig zagged my way through oncoming and cross traffic, with my visibility next to nothing. I made it across the intersection and still ahead of me a 400m stretch of road, which had now become the latest rivulet of the Mekong River. I tried unsuccessfully to avoid the flumes of water being thrown up by the 4WD's, who were finally being used in a manner for which they were desinged. Pulling into the iCAN school car park, I had long forgotten the fact that i looked like a drowned rat, and had the biggest smile on my face.
I felt like a kid again, going out to play in the rain without worry.
The rains are here, and here to stay by the looks of it, oops i say that too soon. The rain has just stopped. I better make a run for it and leave school before it starts again.....

School, Cycling and Street 6Z

It has been a little while since my last post, mainly due to the fact school has started and I have been flat out with that. Only 3 weeks till the first half term break though and the start of the year has flown by. Next weekend I am heading to Sihanoukville, a beach town on the south coast, then cacthing a bus to Laos for the mid term break, then to Bangkok for the weekend after that. I have also booked in to go to Chang Mai in Thailand next February. Exciting times.....

iCAN - My new school
After our Tour De Mekong Island, our first official school day began on campus. Upon entering, what looks like a very plain building from street level, I am greeted by an infinity pool and a huge open area with outdoor furniture, chairs and decor in every colour of the rainbow. Instantly my fears and anxieties about my new place of employment were swept aside.

The school is modern, well stocked, and had everything an educator could need. Right down to the photocopied text books (Thank god for a lack of copyright laws).
The staff are all friendly and the best bit about the whole place is that i am NOT ALLOWED to wear shoes inside. Meaning i walk around barefoot all day everyday!
I only have 6 kids in my class, which is both a blessing and a curse.
I know what the rest of you teachers are thinking,
"How can he complain about only having 6 kids, when i have 30?"
Well it can be tough sometimes. Think group work...I only have enough for 1 group or 2 at the most. But mainly its awesome.

The kids are so well behaved. For example yesterday the leg on my teachers chair broke and i feel flat on my back in the middle of teaching. Imagine the response you might get in Australia or the UK? Screaming laughter, whooping, hollering, grief for days. Here? The all looked on in silence, shocked at what had happened.
"Are you alright Mr Nathan?"
Again another example: The kids here call me Mr Nathan. Informal, personal.
The school does not believe in homework, there are no defined assessment protocols and its generally the most relaxed school i have ever seen.
I may look back at this post in months/years and say,
"How wrong was I?"
But for now.....iCAN see myself loving this place.

ADVENTURES OF THE GREEN MACHINE

Look left, look right, look left again. Then go.....dont hesitate!

The pure craziness that is the traffic in Phnom Penh cannot be described.

The only rule i have picked up so far is: If you have a Lexus 4WD or a Landrover then you have right of way.
When i say this is the only rule, i mean the ONLY rule. Dont even think for a moment this would include something we would consider simple in the west like, driving on the correct side of the road. It is the ONLY rule.

I purchased the Green Machine for a pricely sum of $US35 and he came with comlimentary basket, light, lock and a very tempermental chain which likes to come off at the most inappropriate of times, eg. crossing the busiest steet in Phnom Penh during peak hour.

I ride to school every day, which is only 2 mins away and this contains only right hand turns, which we have come to find are a must to survive. Often we will take a longer route to cut down on left hand turns and therefore the need to cross over lanes of traffic. To be honest to begin with riding here was daunting and almost suicidal but I have learnt quickly to adapt and now feel comforatble enough to ride my bike anywhere, even at night time. Phnom Penh is a relatively small city for the number of people living here so a bike is the perfect vechile to get around on.

Our HOUSE

http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=134053&id=645643528&l=93d6bab617

Two weekends ago we moved into our new house on street 6Z. When i say we i am referring to what is know known as "The Family" or "The Girls and Me."
I have moved in with Olivia and Jo, both from the UK and Andrea, a Kiwi. My initial worries about moving in with girls have subsided and things have been fantastic so far. We all get on really well and have enjoyed each others company immensly so far.
We have the top two floors of the house which we are in and after having made our way past 2 security gates we are into our outdoor lounge room. The middle floor has our bedrooms, kitchen, and 3 bathrooms, then upstairs is the jewel in the crown. A huge rooftop terrace, perfect for parties or just to catch the evening breeze.
After Olly had the showbox of a room at the guesthouse she was really keen on having first dibs on rooms. There were no real fights over rooms and i think everyone is happy with their room, although Olly did complain for the first few days about how dark her room is.
We have big plans for the roof top terrace, and talk of tiling the ground, sand, trees, fairly lights and pool tables are all very exciting. Once we get the first pay cheque through the pimping will begin in readiness for our housewarming bonanza!
Our street is a quiet dead end street with lots of Khmer families. They are all really friendly, however the next door neighbour has the most annoying little dog which yaps its way constantly though both day and night. Im off to the Russian market next weekend to try to find a pellet gun to shut it up.
I guess this is only a small inconvienece compared to some of the other houses we saw with their shoddy plumbing and bizzare architechture (tiles floor to ceiling?? why??)
Check of the photos on facebook by clicking on http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=134053&id=645643528&l=93d6bab617

First impressions of a foreign land...

My eyes have been witness to so many amazing sights in the last few days, as I begin to start my new life in a new country. I could already fill an entire book with amazing stories from things i have seen by people just going about their normal lives in this crazy country. I'm gunna try and condense my last few days into a few small experiences now, it could be long again like the last post, but we'll see....

The Epicurean Delights of the Far East....

When leaving for Cambodia, i had heard stories of fried spiders, cockroaches, bats blood soup and boiled chicken feotus. It was fair to say i wasnt looking forward to what the menus here had to offer.

When i heard that no one really cooks for themself here because eating out is so cheap, and that many Khmer houses dont have a traditional western style kitchen i began to worry a little more.

How wrong i was!!!! The variety and quality of food here in Phnom Penh is outstanding. Thai, Indian, Korean, Italian, French, Spanish, Tex-Mex, Vegan , Vegetarian, whatever you want and never more than US$4-5 for a main meal.

Better than this the local Khmer food is AMAZING! With Cambodia's locailty being wedged between Thailand and Vietnam, the dishes on offer here have the best of both countries fine culinary traditions, topped with the pazzaz and infused with the love that the Khmer people are renowned.

Highlights so far include:

• Green Khmer Chicken Curry


• Chicken Pad Thai


• Korean Sweet and Sour Pork


• Fish Amok


• A whole pineapple cored out and filled with fried rice and vegetables


• A variety of stir fried dishes, always with the freshest of vegetables


• Shrimp Wontons with Sweet Chilli Sauce


• BBQ Pork Skewers with Pineapple Salsa

All of these for no more than US$5, and huge portions. Most of which i struggle to finish due to the sheer amount of fresh, incredible food put before you. I will find it hard to leave this country purely based on the incredible food.

P.S. Dont worry mum when you come to visit theres plenty of Western food for you to have. They even have a KFC for your twister on a friday night ;)

Le Tour de Koh Doch and how i nearly owned a child.....

Our first official activity as an iCan staff was a cycling tour of Koh Doch (silk island) about a 10 minute ferry ride from Phnom Penh across the convergence of the Mekong and Tonle Sap rivers. Having met the rest of the new staff we set off on our bikes around the island making our first stop at a Buddhist pagodas which was one of the very few surviving pagodas after the Pol Pot years.

Everyone was so excited about meeting each other, that on the initial ride to the temple I hardly saw any of the scenery as i was too busy talking to my new friends and collegues. This chatter was instantly replaced with awe and wonder at the serenity of the the pagoda complex which we entered. The ambience and peacefulness of the place was unbelieveable. Everyone was suddenly quiet and all you could hear were the quiet murmurs of contentness at being in such an amazing place.

After giving an offering to the resident monks we were on our way again down dirt roads, with it hard to believe that there was a city of 2 million only 10mins across the river. The rural environment which we had be transported to made it feel like we were hours away from any recognizable civilization.

It is at this point in feel like i should mention the HEAT!!!!! it was unbearable. Around 34 degrees with 90% humidity and no escape from the vicious sun beating down. All this while pedalling rusty old bikes along pothill filled roads. We rode for around an hour or so before lunch under the shade of a tree and in the company of a colony of pesky red ants.

After lunch we rode again through small villages on the island, all the while getting curious looks and shouts of hello from the children who lived on the island.

I can see why Brangelina adopted kids from here, because they are the cutest, happiest kids i have ever seen anywhere in the world, their eyes filled with such innocence and joy, oblivious to what their parents would have experienced in the Pol Pot years.

It was in one of these villages that i was offered a child by an old lady who lived in a lean to squat with her daughter and 6 grandchildren and 4 dogs. I was the first male to enter after a couple of the girls and she immediately pointed at me, looked through me with eyes which had obviously seen more than more care to think about, and started ranting in Khmer and pointing to the smallest child. He had only a t shirt on, no trousers and pants and was carrying a few week old puppy.

I asked the local guide what she had said, and she told me that she told me that the child was now mine and i had to take him with me.

The shock on my face must have been evident, and she started ranting again, pointing to the child and calling him to come over to me. It was it this point i remember the few Khmer words i had learnt from refusing the advances of tuk tuk drivers and replied with "Suom Tos, ot te or kun huy," Sorry, no thank you!

She shook her head an kept insisting and i kept repeating the words and smiling politely, hands together bowing to show respect.

It was a terribly disheartening moment and a desperate act of a desperate woman, wanting nothing more than the best for a child who may not live to see the age of 18......

Welcome to Phnom Penh

Sitting on the rooftop terrace of the Foreign Correspondents Club (FCC) in Phnom Penh looking out over the mighty Mekong and Tonle Sap river on a balmy July evening, sipping Angkor beer while the ever present buzz of tuk tuks and motodups chaotically zoom up the street below me, i finally feel able to say to myself; "Welcome to your new home....."

36 hours earlier i arrived into Phnom Penh to be greeted by the instant steamy sweaty feeling i will have to grow accustomed to over the next 2 years. The heat was oppressive as i was met by Leakhana, the head teaching assistant at iCAN and one of her friends Kasol. I had spent the previous half an hour trying to obtain the correct business visa, after the ad-hoc production line that is Cambodian Immigration had incorrectly given me a tourist visa and then attempted to rip the entire page of my passport out!!!

Leakhana and Kasol were the first Cambodians i had met and already the world famous Khmer friendliness and smile welcomed me to Phnom Penh. Andrea, a kiwi teacher had arrived at the same time and we met as they took us to the promised "school mini bus" which would take us to our guesthouse. The mini bus turned out to be a Toyota Camry with no air-con and little to no room for the bags that contained all our worldly possessions. Andrea and i squeezed into the back with my guitar perched across our already sweat filled laps.

Imagine getting into your car at the beach on the hottest day of summer after its been parked in the sun all day, well that doesn't even come close to how hot it was in the "mini bus." The registration stickers and parking permits were melting off the windows!!!

I wasn't sure what to expect from Phnom Penh, i knew it was going to be different, poor and dirty, but i was in no way prepared for what i saw on that first drive from the airport. Rubbish lay everywhere around the road, in the gutters, hanging from trees, in the rivulets, on balconies, inside doorways, everywhere. Where there wasn't rubbish there were people, masses of them. If they weren't sitting in the doorway of their property or begging in the street they were riding a moto and tuk tuk and zooming all over the road like they had a death wish.

We drove down streets the wrong way, through side streets, down main roads until we reached a sign which said "Tuol Sleng War Museum of Genocidal Killing." It was here we exited the "mini bus" to be greeted by a handful of touts who tried to sell us a thousand different things and offering us rides to Killing Fields. Leakhana checked us into our rooms at the gorgeous Boddhi tree guesthouse and I instantly stripped off my sweat drenched clothes and headed for a cold shower. Never has a cold shower felt so good. After an afternoon nap and i headed downstairs for dinner with Andrea, i ordered a Cambodian Green Chicken Curry and it was delicious! A few beers later and Leakhana returned with 2 more new teachers, both from the UK, Jo and Olivia. We spent the rest of the evening drinking Angkor beer and discussing what the hell we were all doing in this crazy country.

When the bar closed I headed to my huge bed still unsure if coming here was the best idea and wondering if i would survive the culture, and lifestyle let alone the heat. The only comfort i had was that of my new best friend, the fan in my room. Seriously the best thing i have ever had and the most essential item for any bedroom in Cambodia.

I woke drenched in sweat and again headed for the cold shower before a continental breakfast down in the garden with Andrea, Jo and Olivia. We met another new iCAN teacher, Louise another British lady who has lived in Phnom Penh before. She has become and invaluable source of local knowledge. We were weighing up what to do with the day when Andrea mentioned a bar she had heard about which had a pool. An excellent option in the already stifling 10am heat.

We negotiated a tuk tuk ride, for a now very expensive $5, to the Elsewhere Bar and Cafe. The ride was again through dirty moto filled streets until we arrived to the street where the Elsewhere Bar was situated which was relatively clean and filled with expat bars and restaurants.

We enter the high walled bar to be greeted with an oasis of sunlounges, couches and an amazing pool. It was like stepping into another world. The rest of the day was spent sipping beers and lazing in the run, interspersed with dips in the pool. We headed down the road to a local restaurant for some more affordable food ($2 instead of $5) and i had some amazing chicken Pad Thai, and then back to Elsewhere for a further afternoon of relaxing.

It was here i heard first hand about the corruption which plagues Phnom Penh. I met a journalist from the Phnom Penh Post (local English language newspaper) and he passionately ranted for about half an hour about how NGO's (non governmental organisations) as poisoning the Cambodian workforce and not allowing the Khmer people to become independent and to have value for their jobs and respect for their employers. He spoke of the lack of respect for the police and how this was inherent to alot of the problems in Cambodia. It was interesting to hear his point of view and he was very passionate on the topic, almost a world away from the heavenly oasis we were sitting in.

We walked home just before sunset and rested before heading down the river and the "touristy area" for dinner. Our tuk tuk driver this time was called Lucky and he was hilarious. He asked us where we were working and when we told him, he said he was friends with Mr Sam from iCAN and showed us a photo of him he had stuck to the top of his tuk tuk roof. What a small city!!! He entertainingly took us through the Independence monument roundabout (think Champs Elysee roundabout but worse) past the Royal Palace and to the banks of the Mekong and Tonle Sap for our dinner. We got his number as he will be valuable in the future due to his fun loving nature and not trying to rip us off.

After dinner we headed to the world renowned Foreign Correspondents Club for a drink. The rustic charm of the place is set off by the disturbing photos of the Khmer Rouge days lining the stairway as you enter the bar. The FCC was home to the foreign journos and diplomats who came to Phnom Penh after the fall of the Khmer Rouge and is a Phnom Penh institution, a place to be and be seen.

As I sat on the rooftop terrace laughing after a great day with new friends, it dawned on me that this was my new home. The fear had subsided, the excitement had kicked in and the adventure had well and truly begun. My next 2 years are going to be wild, crazy, backwards, exciting, eye opening, absolutely life changing, and i cant wait.................

T-minus 72 Hours and counting....

Welcome to my blog, i thought i would start this to keep everyone updated while i am away on my latest adventure. I am hopeless at keeping up with group emails, so i figure this works better. Hope you enjoy.....

So its 72 hours until i leave Tasmania and set foot into the unknown and the next great adventure, CAMBODIA! I fly out of Hobart at lunchtime on Thursday and after spending a night with Whitty in Melbourne i board my flight to Phnom Penh via KL.

I have spent the last few days trying to pack (quite unsuccesfully) and organise myself. Still got heaps to do, and i know i'll leave it to the last minute, but it will get done.

Quite nervous at this stage, but also excited. Just not sure what to expect at the moment, sure once i am there I will love it.....i hope?